We were not this bad, what happened

Obesity cases have been steadily rising in the Indian subcontinent. The consumption of processed foods and fatty goodies are on the rise and, therefore, unarguably so is obesity. We were doing alright all these years, what happened? You walk into a mall in any Indian city, you would be drawn to the same sugary, fatty junk that we have now deemed "not healthy" here in the western world. Things like donuts, potatoes drenched in oil and many more unhealthy products are flooding the Indian households. It would not be fair if I just blamed it on the foods, we are becoming a LAZY bunch people! Not only do we not go out and actively exercise, even the little we did around the house has been replaced. What with so much domestic help and all...

The good thing here in the US is that a lot of the people are very conscious and awareness about obesity as a real health issue is ever-increasing.

I am not sure how best to warn people of the dangers of such a rapidly changing lifestyle. But people please if you read this post, educate your friends and family so they can educate their friends and family and hopefully we can make people realize that by slightly modifying our eating and exercising habits we can actually lead healthier lives.

PS You can read this article and this one to learn at least a little more about obesity in India. Not that a lot of research is going on right now.

You are not alone...

I find this amusing and annoying at the same time, I understand when you work you want to left alone but science is all about mingling- sharing ideas, sharing crazy hypotheses, sharing work space and more. I think science would have remained rudimentary if the iPOD was discovered 200 years ago. I am not sure I can embrace the idea of come to the lab, turn your iPOD on and do whatever it is that you might be doing- surfing the net, working on an experiment or reading papers. My old lab was different that way and I liked it- we did not flaunt the "oh-look-wires-coming-out-of-me and so glued to my ears I cannot take it off" thingies. We talked incessantly, our thoughts constantly collided with one another giving rise to better experiments, we would badger the newbies in the lab calling it the "we would love to get to know you" phase.
This iPOD fetish might have something to do with being in a big lab, your bench spaces themselves are so far apart that there is very limited extent of interaction.
Anyway, I think as scientists we should limit the use of such devices- use it albiet sparingly, at least when at work. I am just a fly on the wall but I hope I am making sense here. I think this is not just true about science, you walk on the road all you can see are people either talking to themselves (back in the old days we used to think such people had the crazies!), or talking to a cell phone or concentrating on the music that is playing right into their heads.
So long people...man is a social being afterall, is he not?

Start your day GRUMPY...

This morning something odd happened- well it might not be that unusual but it seemed a bit unnerving to me anyway. We came to the car parked on a busy road (especially crazy at 9:00 in the morning). He got in to drive while I waited for him to pull out of the icy mess and give me some space to get in. Incidentally he did not see the bicyclist. She thought he was going to stop for her but he did not see her. She was yelling out "stop for the bicyclist" but of course he did not hear her. He pulled out really slowly, while she also kept at it- and all that happened was she stumbled a bit. Okay mistake probably was his- I don't know, she saw him driving and not stopping and so she decided not to stop either... anyway she got really worked up and started screaming like crazy. Things like "Jacka**, can't you stop for a bicyclist" and much more. So nothing odd about it, right?
Well, while she yelling I was watching her in awe. I could not understand how someone could actually be so grumpy early in the morning. I mean come on, how do you yell like that with such loathing in the morning. After a presumably good night's rest, Yyou wake up, have coffee and breakfast, wash, get dressed and leave for whatever it is that you are going to do for the rest of the day. Amidst all these things what happens that makes you crabby like that? Then what happens to the rest of your day? May be she is going through something genuine...
I sure felt sorry for the next person that came in her way.
I cannot fathom such emotions, can you?

Its snow holiday again...

...not for me anyway
Now I understand how poor Maryland's snow cleaning system is- it was supposed to snow only 1 to 2 inches. Guess what, UMD closed at around noon. And here in Boston, it snows about 8 to 12 inches every time and people act as though its JUST another thing. Usually the pavements and roads get cleared up rather quickly and that is all that matters, innit? Everything is seemingly normal, well me being the exception. Nothing is ever normal for me during winter. So far its been not so bad, while it was snowing outside, I stayed on inside! But there is going to be a snowstorm tomorrow. We will see how that goes, eh!!

I could go on and on...

Hmm...I have never felt so strongly about anything political. But today as I incessantly pour over the news about Mr. Obama's inauguration ceremony, I feel like I should have been there, where all the action is. I feel terrible having left DC before this great event. I must tell you though, I am not sure if Mr. Obama will be a successful president but there is something about him that tells me that he will do good. I love his speeches, I love his simplicity and I hope his actions are as sincere as his words. I also for some strange reason believe that he is a good man (let me tell you I have a blanket hatred against world's politicians- to me they are necessary evil!).
The only thing that has been on my mind these past few days is the fact that I am not in DC to witness this good, honest man take oath to the highest office in the United States. Also, I would not get to see "the beast" too! I want to be a part of this grandeur, seems like 2 million people are expected, too bad I am not one of them. What more, I want to kick myself for having left DC, I could have stayed on until the inauguration ceremony. Work calls right!
Well, if you let me, I would go on and on about how badly I want to be there. Does not matter now, I will be there in spirit, I guess!

PS: After all this rant about Mr. Obama, I guess it is only fitting that I read his book!

American exceptionalism

Yesterday on Diane Rehm Show (npr.org), the guest was Godfrey Hudson- the author of the book called The Myth of American Exceptionalism. I have not read the book and after that interview with Diane, I want to. This book seems to be provocative and is bound to offend a lot of people. In fact there was a caller who said that the author was the most condescending guest ever on the show. Well it did not seem that way to me, but then I am NOT an American. What struck me most was when a caller asked the author if saying "God Bless America" was a sign of such exceptionalism. Interestingly, the first time I heard that phrase in this country I thought of it as the weirdest thing- why would you want God to bless only a select few, why not God Bless the World or something like that. Anyway, Prof Hudson did not seem to have an answer to that question but he too had thought it was a bit strange. He is an English guy and it is impressionable that he would write such a book (well he has been studying this country for more than 3 or 4 decades I cannot remember). He argues that America is not exceptional after all and the idea of being exceptional, sort of you know, a keeper or a custodian or even the protector of the world in a sense, could prove dangerous.
I think Prof. Hudson kind of speaks out what has been going on in my mind but I guess I would definitely read it to get his perspective.

PS: I love Diane Rehm show and the thing I hate most about Boston is I can only to listen to recorded versions of her show on the radio. So I take advantage of npr.org and listen to 88.5 online.

My first few days at my NEW JOB

Finally I am working again- started this Monday.
Pa walked with me (he would rather say he was walking me to my bldg on Oxford St, just like when I was a little girl except then my mum used to do it!)- the icy pavements made it very treacherous and my dad cautioned me by falling down himself. It was only a 3hr work-day, getting done with all the paperwork (was not much at all).
The next day I met with the boss for about 15-20 minutes, and since then I have been reading and reading and read.....
Cannot believe that the FIRST week of the new year is coming to an end. Hopefully I can come up with a good project and that too within a reasonable amount of time coz I need to get back to the bench, y'all.

take care
hope you all had a good week

My trip to San Diego

Last year that is Nov 2008 after I submitted my thesis and successfully endured the 9 hour ride to Boston from College Park (It felt like I was the one who drove). Anyway the next day I left for a trip to SD (I stayed in SD for a week) and Boulder (this was only for two days, thanks to the single runway-high traffic-useless SD airport combined with a foggy morning).
The first 2 days I was by myself, took the trolley tour around San Diego. And thanks to my host there, I ended up on a shopping spree (he left me alone for the two days and what better thing to do than SHOP!!)
One thing I realized in San Diego- I love Mexico- the people, the culture, the crafts. The one place I loved in there is SD is the Old Town San Diego, a place that is considered to be the birthplace of California. While, they still have a few original structures made of Adobe bricks, a lot of the buildings are reconstructed. Despite this you do get an 1800's feel when you visit the Old town State historic Park. Other than SD was just alright.
For Thanksgiving we drove down to Mammoth lakes park. I don't ski and Renga could not snowboard or ski (you see the day I landed he broke his finger playing cricket, coincidental eh?) and Ashwin decided to give us company- therefore we put on a pair of snow-shoes to hike but it was totally unnecessary because it had not snowed that much. The next day we took a long detour via Death Valley and this is another place I instantly fell in love with. How very DEAD, you might think but then just as any desert landscape there are a few survivors. The photograph one the right was taken from the lowest point in the Northern Hemisphere, this place is about 86 meters below sea level and therefore has salty flakes all over.
I am not sure if people might agree if I call Death Valley beautiful but believe me it was to me and interestingly it reminded me of Denali Natl Park, except one was lush and green while the other was brown and dry. So it was fun thanksgiving and I must thank the guys for such a lovely trip.

I then flew to Denver, CO to meet a newly married couple. Spent a couple of day with them in Boulder and then headed back for a short stay in Boston, a stay that lasted for two days. I was off to India in two days.

Another year

Well the truth is now the New Year means nothing to me- one more year have passed by, nothing around me has changed much (although a lot of things have happened in general around the world- mostly the kind that bring sadness). I am still the same crazy person, well a year older and waiting to go bald any day now!!! The beginning of a new year only reminds me of the fact that I have not accomplished anything in the past year- same old same old mediocre life! The only thing that I always have trouble with is writing the dates correctly especially in my lab notebooks, apparently I like to be stuck in the past!
As a little girl, I used to want to celebrate the arrival of a New Year with all my friends and family - you have fun and all that, you know; but that never happened. In fact for most of my life- it was just the four of us and grandma sometimes; then it came down to the three of us and grandma. These years have dragged along with them, the very little fun-side I once used to possess (I believe I had a fun-side!!). Now, I don't understand why one should celebrate- apart from traditions, I realize that people celebrate the hope that the next year will be better than the one that passed. It could also be because people want to forget all their woes last few days of the year and be happy. I do respect all these sentiments and traditions but I just don't understand what the big deal is!
So those of you who already are in the next year and those of you who soon will be- whats the point, its just another day, innit?!
That was not pathetic was it- well this however does not mean that I would not WISH YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR, I do wish all of you the very best in life (but I do that almost everyday)
LOKA SAMASTHA SUKHINO BHAVANTU (Sorry blogger does not yet have the Hindi translation thingee for Mac!)

Now I really am in Boston

A 10-day trip to San Diego, CA and Boulder, CO; a week-long trip to Madras, India; and an eventful 4 day trip to College Park, MD, I am back in Boston. I have so much to write about and hopefully will get to all of them before I forget what I wanted to pen.

Am DONE!

People accomplish various things in life
Oct 8th , Chalfie, Shimomura and Tsien won the Nobel Chemistry
Oct 10th, Paul Krugman won the Nobel Economics
Nov 4th, Obama became the President of the United States
Nov 11th, Abbhi defended her PhD (normally I do not talk in third person!)

So those are some pretty big ones I can think of!!

What should I be doing

This question has been creeping for a while now- should I stay put in Science? I don't think I am capable of staying put for a simple reason that I am very absent-minded. Though not always, but the times that I am not myself, I make mistakes in my experiments. It might be normal, no one is perfect but in Science the feeling I get it you have no room for that. Being yourself, the worst self is just not an option. The other thing is, for a person like me who takes experimental failures as personal ones (oh trust me nothing can be more stressful than using your work to gauge you as a person- it almost always becomes existential!) , science may not be the best option.
Since this is one of those "why-am-I-doing-what-I-am-doing" moments, I took this test that tells what careers suit one's personality- and the things it came up with are pretty much what I would love to be

• Artist- YES
  
• Historian- who does not love history
  
• Banker- yeah right!
  
• Novelist- have been thinking about it for a while now
  
• University Professor- I don't think students will like me
  
• Photographer- can call myself an amateur
  
• Vet- thanks, but no thanks
  
• Paralegal
  
• Graphic Designer
  
• Online Content Developer
  
• Webmaster
  
• Producer
  
• Managing Director- hmm, this might just be perfect
  
• Nutritionist- I need to use it on myself
  
• Advertising
  
• Nursing

This test did not get me out of my bad mood completely but it sure did boost my morale, after all I have a shot at being a novelist!!


PS: OK back to preparing for defense, hope it goes alright!

So long Greenbelt

I love this quite little city- one of the first cooperative housing ventures in the US. The people are as beautiful as this quaint place. A stroll on a gorgeous summer evening would always entail cheerful hellos and heys from the passers-by. The Roosevelt center, my favourite haunt, has great food with places like New Deal cafe and Generous Joe's deli. Oh I definitely will not forget the smells of freshly baked pastries at Chef Lou's (that is if you can catch a slice before he closes for the day and I don't think he is open everyday!). The center has a lot of activities in the summer.
And recently we have even started having our own farmer's market, that is all that was missing...
So why would anybody not like a place with great food, a good movie theater (don't expect an AMC, but I sure love the Old P&G), a farmers market and a "yummo-baked goods-anytime"and all of this you could just walk to....come on now!!!
I/We are out of Greenbelt (I am a temp acco at a friend's in College Park) as of yesterday and I am already feeling miserable. I love Greenbelt!!

Kudos to all those who still value such cooperatives and take the efforts needed to maintain it.

PS I cannot believe I spent nearly 10 minutes writing this post instead of preparing for my defense. One week to go junta

Weird

How come when we desperately want something to work it NEVER works. Is that an anomaly only in my life, I wonder!

I don't understand this

Okay, so everyone wants a bipartisan bailout deal worked out. "They" keep saying we got to do what is best for the country, put the country first yada yada yada (isn't this McCain's punch line?!)
So how come Nancy Pelosi's statement about how Republicans have failed in their economic policies is the biggest reason for the failure of the trillion dollar bailout deal? Both sides should have put country first and worked out something out, right?! It just seems so appalling to me that the politicians can be so hypocritical, on one hand all we hear is "this is the biggest crisis, akin to the great depression" so on and so forth and on one the other, both parties have been using this crisis as the biggest marketing strategy, pointing finger at one another...quite annoying actually and I am not even the one voting!!!


PS Aim for bipartisanship, try not to be an elitist...

say, can I do this again later sometime

Boy, that is one question I won't ask myself, may be I will consider it if someone offers to write my thesis for me! Its so hectic, I can hardly think about anything else. I guess part of the problem could be that most of next month will be spent doing experiments for my last chapter and writing my thesis. And of course it does not help when your boss says "you are going to stress yourself and you are going to stress me out; you brought it on yourself" yada yada yada......so its like a Law and order CI episode- Will Goren and Eames catch the killer? Will I finish on time so that I can defend on the date I have set for in October? I tell you similar emotions- people who catch killers should be made to write a thesis (not necessarily theirs, that would be more fun I suppose)

So the latest development, I postponed my defense by a month (so hopefully November folks) and now I am hoping that I will be actually done by then. Not that much has changed because of that, you know work expands to fill time, so am back to nervously muttering "oh god let my experiments work and please please let me finish at least in November!"

Frankly work is the only thing right now in my life and not that I mind it but sure don't mind easing up a bit!

So about Denali

Denali Natl Park- really beautiful, mountains do have character don't they?!
Drive was just filled with amazing views. We stayed at Savage river campground- mosquito free zone. Can you believe we actually socialized with a bunch of people who were also camping- 2 of them go to school in Fairbanks I think and there were 2 more of their friends from California- the point of telling this, we were so loud apparently that we got shushed...how can someone go to sleep when it was nice and bright outside? So the first day was mostly spent on a bus from the visitor center to Wonder lake (private vehicles can go only up to a certain point in the park) but we got to see so much of the wildlife- grizzlies, a fox, caribou, moose and its calf (oh the calf was really cute), sheep, sheep, more of sheep!! I must tell you the ground (tree?) squirrels are ugly. We hiked a little bit at the end of the bus drive (had to stretch a bit)- took the McKinley bar river trail, our first and only encounter with huge mosquitoes! And by the way, have you ever seen a person walking, well more like a stroll, fall face down in a slush- too bad you should have seen me- all covered in mud..
It does not matter- we got to see the double peaks!!! It happens only 3 or 4 times in a month and we were there, magnificent double peaks.
The next day was more on a less trodden trail- it was fun, just drove up to Talkeetna and started walking in one direction. It was fun to cross those little creeks, the water felt really good. After that little bit of well hiking around, we decided that was that and got back to the car where the ranger told us interesting stories about fightin' off bears and how he saw a bear chasing a moose, he was pretty vocal, I am not exactly sure if I felt like believing everything he said but it sure sounded adventurous. It was kind of disheartening that the trip was getting to its end.
Untainted beauty is what it was and I sure want it to stay that way. I would love to see how the place looks like in winter (only I am not sure if I can brave it!) But it would be fun to go back again and again and again folks!!!
ciao

Alaska- the last frontier

So we are back from Alaska. That was a long time ago and this post is way past due!
I flew into Anchorage on the 26th of June, well it took a while since I had flown all the way down to Dallas and then up to Anchorage. On the way to Anchorage, we saw Mt.Rainier- oh what a pretty sight, magnificent! Reached there at around 7:30PM. Sun never sets in the Alaskan empire during summer- interesting trivia, the moon was around only for about a maximum of 1h. Anyway-
June 27th- (not many great snaps from this trip because it was raining, and the camera was fogging up pretty bad!)
~2h ride to Seward for the cruise to see some cool glaciers. But the weather had to play spoilt-sport. I guess I should not complain since the cruise did not run the day before due to really high ocean. And also because I got to see an Orca pass by at about 10feet!!! Oh most amazing, it was this close- I could have jumped on it and rode!! We could not go down to the glaciers, there were people on the boat who did not have the stomach for it, no literally they were quite sick.. and the waves were pretty high. Oh ours was a small boat- she was called misty, went upto 25knots (or layman-22miles/hr) pretty fast I would say. We saw a lot of wildlife- humpback whales were quite sight, lone bald-eagles high up on a tree, penguin-like puffins adorning the island (the name of which I have forgotten) and the same island there were a harbor seals, man these are some lazy creatures! The glacier that we did see was one of the Aialik- Holgate glacier, quite massive, very blue! There were some interesting world war II stuff too. It was really cold though, I mean after the first 5-6 h of the journey, I was pretty much inside the cabin the whole time.
The next day was at Anchorage- went to the state's largest flea market. It was beautiful weather and seemed like everyone was outside. That evening we left for Denali national park.

But I will blog about it in my next post folks! Be patient and trust me Alaska is worth spending money on!

So the end is in sight folks

The end is in sight- I now have a job, well if you can call getting a postdoctoral position as having a job. Anyway what is important is I finally get to move on but hold on- who is going write my thesis? I cannot think of anything else that I dread so much- oh-the-no one-reads-this part of my PhD. But it has to be done, and I will have to get it done somehow.
My labmates have been nice enough to give me the wildest suggestions but unfortunately using any of those would be deemed as plagiarism (LOL). The only hope for me- I have a job and I need to start sometime in October (hey hey, I did not come up with this, my boss said so!)

A journey

Trains have been a part of my childhood and most of my teen years. Over those years I have developed a strange bond with Indian Railways. Other countries might have better trains but none can offer "the journey" that our trains provide. There is something about traveling by trains. I remember the time in BITS just before holidays- I used to be so eager and excited to being my journey back home, I initially thought it was due to homesickness but I got the same feeling of excitement when I left home (well, I was sad to leave my family and go far north to study...!!). Those oh-about-2days of train journey were a bliss. Sit by the window muttering a song to yourself, once in a while humor your fellow passengers with a story or a joke (inquiries about where they are coming from-great starters!)- somehow when I am on a train, sorrow/sad is not an emotion- usually its laughter, solitude and happiness!! I pretty much get down wherever the train stops- very important, get a taste of the local food. Oh..those matka chais in Kharagpur, jamuns (the fruit, if you have never had these you have missed something great), vadas in vijayawada, not-one-of-my-favorite-srikhand, guavas (when they are in season)....Not just food but somehow getting down at a stop, I felt like I belonged there and that to me was way cool!
I used to stand the door taking in all the air and smell of the earth as much as possible- as if I were going to die tomorrow or something. Interestingly, there were ticket checking guys-some of them just warned me, there were others that yelled but there were few others that always had a gruesome story to tell about young boys and girls getting killed by standing alongside those giant iron doors. When I am on a train there is always sense of urgency- finish a good number of books, taste all the food you can, oh sleep, I forgot that, sleep as much as you can!!! T might be dirty, my co-passengers might be annoying, hey but all that.. cannot keep me from enjoying my train journey. Live a little, let go of your comfort for a just a few hours and you will be the happiest passenger in the world!!

PS my dream- to travel the Indian subcontient by trains, stop at every little station and explore the villages nearby- and take a shot at writing about it!

Fear...

Here is another one borne out of my thought-experiments!

She sat on the couch- TV was on, music was playing on her laptop, phone was ringing. She sat still on the couch, unmindful of all the noises that surrounded her. (gosh! how I wish I could do that...get away from all the noises) She was scared- scared of what, that she could not tell. Fear of the unknown possibly, her mind wandered, it was as if taking a stroll in Central Park. Why do people fear the unknown? Why do we as humans have to know everything? This was her chance, chance to be happy and not worry about the unknown. After all she had everything that she could ever want, well may be not ever want but it was more than enough for the time being. Then why could she not get the unknown out of her mind? She knew giving up things she loved doing most or the people she loved was not helping either. It was debilitating. What is her way out, when her thoughts are chockablock with the unknown?
Well, her mind seemed to have fagged off after the stroll. She jolted and was greatly stricken by the noise around her. She decided to take a stroll herself and find the comfort she needed under the starry skies.

One world, one language

As a lover of languages, such articles always make me fret a bit. Not that I don't understand the importance of learning English, after all it is soon to become the ONLY language (even with a billion + population each of China and India). But my only wish is to not see such a thing happen in my lifetime! I take pride in the fact that Indians are very multilingual- we somehow do not even realize this fact, most of us can speak at least 3 different languages including English. Isn't that quite a feat?
So why do I think trying to do our bit in saving the languages from totally dying out is important? Quite simple really- I consider English to be a language of stinginess- alphabets have been stripped down to bare minimum. English lacks the bounty of some of the other languages. Well, I can only imagine that it would not be too long before we start using Newspeak as the "world official langauge". We can see it heading there, can we not? What with A and Es being replaced by whatever?!!
So folks go on learn as much languages as possible and don't forget your own native tongue!!

Thats it 4 2nite, BCNU soon

PS Orwell, IMAO was one of the best!!!!

Finally...

Hold on...I am not graduating....well at least not yet. Finally my/ our paper has been accepted.
It is a suspense as to where it got through but I can assure you- its big ladies and gentleman (please people don't spoil the surprise and crse others can take guesses)!!!
But you know what, there is hardly any excitement left in me, may be because I am tired and it just took too long, too many people and too much of work (most of which first ended up in supplementary section during the first review process and then removed altogether from the paper after the 2nd review!). It was very funny, here I was thinking I could relax a little, but the reverie was spoilt when my boss comes to me the next day and goes "so- any-data-for-me".
Anyway am back to work, well it never stopped actually.

PS Next time I give this title, I probably means that I have either graduated or just left the country

Its already February!!

I have been trying to crawl of this hole I am in right now to at least say hello to the blogosphere- but seems like I am not doing a good job of it.
So for now just take it from me- if you are going to a PhD, think first- do I want to die young or go crazy? if your answer to either of the questions is YES then by all means go for it....My friend you are now in the MATRIX!!!!


PS did you notice how the title had nothing to do with the content?

Thanksgiving at Smoky mountains

What better than spending the long weekend in a nice cabin house with a beautiful view of the mountains willing to reveal their fiery colors and a lake that is dried up. Hope it does not sound too bad coz it was certainly not bad- the house was amazing. although it probably would have been worthwhile to stay at such a place when you can actually enjoy the outdoors. Thanksgiving weekend was too cold for me. The mountains were beautiful- I felt sad seeing the remnants of summer (dried up plants which would have borne some wonderful wild flowers). As always with a big group there is always the issue of where to go and what to do, but there were a few of us who actually followed the herd. So fortunately I not contribute to the 1000h planning sessions!!!
So day 1- a hike and then whatever was the plan, crse did not work that way, nature would have it otherwise.. Anyway, we did do the mistake of taking "the most" congested route through any Natl Park..a 11 mile scenic loop has never been so frustrating, at the end of it was a decent trail (Abrams falls, I think was the name). May be I would visit the great mountains in springtime to enjoy some wild flowers and some good hikes (was not keen on hikes- it was cold...and it had snowed about 16inches up at higher elevations). For all that chagrin we were rewarded with the appearance of hoofed-deer (for want of a better name), some wild turkeys and the star of the show- a black bear!!! yes yes..he stood unperturbed while we stared at him from a safe distance (we were in the car)
Day 2 The Indian settlement was nice and probably nicer if you were willing to lighten your wallet. It was funny coz there were people in the gang who came to Cherokee for some action and did not realize that it was just a settlement where tourists come, spend money and generate revenue for the natives (in fact main form of revenue comes from casinos a.k.a legal gambling). We did manage to get to the highest point of the mountains-clingman's dome Drive almost all the way and then a 0.5 mile hike (quite steep and very cold!) Pity we spent most time in the car because the cabin house where we stayed (Dandridge) was quite far from civilization. We did have our share of fun at the cabin with some "oh-I-would-never-watch-this-again" movies to party games.
The one thing I would have loved is a leisurely walk in Gatlinburg, a quaint little town/city, all decked up for the holidays.

So if you are planning to go to the mountains- Avoid the scenic loop if you can, and look around you never know who might pay you a visit!!!

Can I publish my own book, please?!!!

If Scott Adams can write and publish a book, so can you or rather so can I*. In any given day, there will be at least one author being interviewed on NPR. These people range from politicians and their wives to some random dude writing his memoirs. You listen to them and you go "what, who are these people" and more importantly, "who on earth will read their books" and "who on earth would want to publish them?". Dick Cheney's wife, Valerie Plame Wilson, Barrack O'bama, and loads of others, I cannot remember all of them of course- I mean they are already all over the media, what more can there be to say. Although I am curious as to what the contents of these books might be I am sure I won't buy or borrow any...basically I won't read them!! I think it is a waste of time knowing what these liked-by-paparazzi have to say about their lives. Books are supposed to impart knowledge and what can I possibly gain from reading O'bama's life history or even worse- Jessica Simpson's book on dream weddings (now really....if she can write a book .....we all should, well probably she hired someone to write it for her...still!!!!)
Well...think about it, to me this trend of writing/ publishing a book as soon as you are remotely famous seems very American. If you consider writing a book, consider media publicity; could be any of these following- imprisonment, might help if you are a friend of Lindsay Lohan; a political career, you could get to give a piece of your mind to Bush Jr. or anything else innovative you can think of!
So I got to stop now...have a book to write people!!!

* If you aren't already a dilbert fan- go to dilbertblog.

Dealing with "them"

Well dealing with parents is harder than I thought! Here is what I think- they are leading a what is seemingly static life and since we have undergone so many changes, it hard for both of us to come to a state of agreement! Somehow I am very different from them or so I think. When and how this dichotomy happened- but it seems to have, I am quite diffferent than they are. The problem though lies in the fact that they are oblivious to this- they do not see that I am different- for good or for bad , that is a different issue altogether now, isnt it? They think I am this 2 year old who requires constant attention and care. Anything that I do or say does not seem to do much, in fact it ends up in an argument. So I let them give me all the care and attention!!
Something that my mum asked me made me really think about this- she asked me something like "so you dont need me?" And I was taken aback, did not know how to answer- ofcourse I dont need her, why would I need her? I was not sure what to answer- if I said yes that would be a lie, if I said no she would feel bad!!!
So anyway, I am sure one day I will figure out how to tell them that I am an adult now and was for a long time and that they should slowly disengage from all that they do for me and start doing stuff for themselves...they have done more than what needs to be done and I am thankful for that. It is my turn now to make sure they do things that they might have put off because they were caring for me all these years!!!

Bihar se laloo!!!

Agreed- he is the man, he is the man who made profit out of the biggest government endeavours- the Indian railways (mind you not a lot of these goverment, I mean anywhere in the world, run organizations make profit..) I am mindful and appreciative of that facr but I still cannot tolerate it when he shows up on a TV show (yeah I watch SaReGaMaPa challenge on Zee).What I cannot tolerate much more than Laloo is the fact that we Indians can never give up being subservient. He is minister and a bad one at that...then why bother with things such as"Sir, I am fan of yours...aap yeh kaise karte ho, woh tho kamal kiya apne...apki blessings chahiye sir bas wohi kafi hai!!!!!!" Not just the contestants of the show, the judges and the spectators also had something or the other to admire about him. What can you admire in such a man- a very average person (I am being generous now!) who just happened to be a man of power. And most of all he was an hour late to the show during which we had to endure some pretty bad music.

PS Anyway this actually brings to what my next post will probably be- what is respect, when and who should it be given to? (Interestingly this was the topic of a lecture given today by Dayand Saraswati!)

Extremely loud and incredibly close- a book I am trying to read

So among all books I have read, I would say this book "Extremely loud and incredibly close" is the weirdest। A strange way of depicting the emotions and sentiments of a young boy who lost his father in the 9/11 attack. Oskar Schell is on an inspiring mission to all the five burroughs of Newyork (at least that is what the it says on the cover!) I cannot imagine how much time it took for this author to write a book such as this- what sort of thoughts and emotions did he have to go through before writing every page of this book.
Anyway I could not read it beyond about 100 pages (reading a book was never such a torment), so returned it to the library actually even before the due date (come on y'all that hardly happens!
The reason for me being persistent with "Extremely loud" was this other book- I went through an I-cannot-read-this phase...it was A.S.Byatt's "The Game". For about a year I would start the book , read it until a particular page (it was always around the same page quite surprisingly) and drop it...after about 3-4 trials...not only did I manage to finish it but infact I loved the book. Well, that did not happen with "Extremely loud".
So, if you have already read through this weird book...then I guess I would have to put you in the category of strange people with stranger tastes!
Ciao
Happy reading!

Have you read it?

Warning may contain spoilers!!!!

Well its Harry Potter time once again... I got the book on Saturday and finally managed to finish it yesterday (even though all of Sunday I could not lay hands on the book, busy cooking). The book was dragging in parts but there were times when I thought JK Rowling had really used her imagination. I did not like the big war like event outside Hogwarts but I did love the fact that Snape was indeed a "good man". So all is well that ends well, I guess (dont want to give too much away). What was the epilogue about- seemed like she generally had to add it to sort of give it an ending or something....can you imagine Harry's childern (hopefully there won't be books about them!)- was quite funny actually. If you read just the epilogue you would wonder as to why on earth did this book get so much popularity-certainly not the writing. The epilogue was very mediocre. On the whole it was alright. I must say the best reads were Goblet of Fire and Half Blood Prince. I am slightly sad that this is it for the Potter boy. SO go ahead give him a big farewell!!!

Mirror mirror on the wall....

For the first time in years, she stood in front of a dusty mirror hanging from the largest wall in her room- a beautiful victorian style mirror that has been horrendously underused. She had never, in years, paused for more than a few seconds in front of this long piece of glass..just to check if she looked personable enough. Today as she looked at herself, she realized how much time has whizzed by. She was fraught with a feeling of having aged all of a sudden..she was only 32, how could she look so old. Shiny grey hair and thin lines on her face gave her a shiver. How could this have happened- she had started using every anti-aging formula she could find in the market- she was very preemeptive. She was angry that her reflection was showing someone that was not her, someone that she was not comfortable with. She was in tears, but she did not understand as to why she felt so weak. She did not understand if it was just her countenance and looks that bothered her so much or was it something much more than that. After spending considerable time introspecting, she knew one thing- life was too short and there were just too many things that she wanted to do. She knew she had to take affirmative steps- not just to be happy but to make others happy. She had a smirk on her face. When she looked at herself in the mirror there was that same old sparkle in her eyes, yes something which everyone used to adore about her when she a child!! Boy, how could a mirror...

Am I an addict?

So its either a channel where chefs churn out yummy stuff in their fancy kitchens or a channel with formally clad men and women using hi-tech gadgets to solve crimes (past, present and infact future crimes can be solved-believe me!!!. Give me one of these- me and the couch will become one. I have begun to wonder-may be I am an addict- it is not however reached a point where (yet!) I get mentally agitated if I don't get my daily doses of one or both of the above mentioned "idiot box series". I do howevere once in a while imagine myself being in a forensic lab and solving some cool cases. I must say these shows somehow bring in a sense of grandeur-reality seems to be lost in it. I have resisted the monster for a long time until I came here- I guess weekdays especially after work, past time TV watching has turned into this rote.
Well as long as it does not become an addiction of sorts.....

Anyway folks...may more crimes be solved!!!!

PS boy there is a website for every darndest thing...I will not say kill the TV but the least we can do is make room for more activities.

I am still in grad school

Life was going on..until one day we decided to publish some of my/ our work. Then it began- the blots had to look prettier, images had to look sexier (guys guys.....unfortunately these are sexy images of cells and worms!!) and numbers needed to be tighter (who knows when you might come across one of those statisticians who might say "of course there is a 90% increase in the experimental sample compared to the control, but is the difference significant" and you, on the other hand give them the what- are- you -talking -about look). So this is what I have been doing- not all of it (I am just one of the authors!!) and I must admit it is harder than I thought. Especially when you have to make your figures, constantly imagining as to how they might look when they are compressed by these journals to say 40-50% of their original sizes!!! Thats quite a feat is'nt it? If you were ever wondering where I was or secretly hoping "Dear God-let it be true, let that blog be inactive forever and ever".....I am back (kinda!!).
PhD is hard man.....and to all of those of you who managed to get by without ever having to say "I can quit right now!"- may be you should go through a reality-check...

PS: I am not a great fan of statisticians, they can be quite twisty and hard to follow most of the times. Read this or this

Its her Birthday!!

"Its her Birthday today!!" my mother declared aloud. As I look up at her face I could see speckles of tears trying to fall out of her eyes and she was holding them back so much so that she would not blink. I wanted to put my arms around her and tell her that it was alright to cry. All I could do was whisper out a few mumbled words amongst which some might have been "yes, it is or yes it would be". Neetu, my only sister would have been a brilliant, beautiful 24 year old woman. On this day-on her birthday, I cannot help but think about all the times that we had together (well most of them were spent fighting..). Somehow what I thought was impossible did indeed happen- I actually learnt to live without her and as far as my parents are concerned- live for her and live like I have become one with her. I have emerged as a strong person while the strongest person I knew, my mom, has become decrepit! Even now ma talks of Neetu as though she still exists. After all Neetu was the darling of the family. Although I don't talk of her much, I still remember the last day- she was calm and composed, she had that dainty smile on her face, sort of saying goodbye to all of us.
Well if I were a little younger, I would have spent a few more years wishing for a miracle to bring back our "bulki darling", but I know better now (or at least not to hope for anything unimaginable). So I go straight to my mom, put my arms around her and all we could do was shed a few tears.

Earth day-this Sunday

Hi folks,

Its Earth day, this Sunday April 22nd. I knew it was sometime now so I was wondering what little steps I can take to celebrate being a part this wonderland called EARTH. I try to reduce, reuse and recycle when I can. It is quite a challenging thing to do specially because I live with roommates. When it comes to conserving energy of any sort- my roommates are what I would call "Prodigal"- may be a strong word but that is what they are. Caring about the environment is the last thing on their minds (and they might even actually give a reason "what can we do we are grad students?!!"). Why do some of us, at least try our best, to preserve what is left our Earth while there are others who don't even care!! (yeah that's what it is- grad students or not, where there is will there is a way) What is even more upsetting, is the fact that most of these people think big and dream big but unfortunately only about themselves- in fact I am tempted to call them all "selfish to an extent". But my personal opinion aside...how hard is it to turn those lights off when not in use, save water by closing the tap when washing dishes or brushing your teeth or well the reason that triggered this post- turn your heaters off when it is 68F outside!!!! This is not a post to let my anger out after seeing the heater the light on (well...may be not entirely), it is more so because I want folks visiting this blog to understand that caring for our planet Earth is as important as cleaning yourself up- after all it is first home!!! So get up and do something, anything (and don't lie to yourself that you conserve enough!!) It is time we started caring, all of us- grad students or not!!

Virginia tech massacre

I did not even get to read the news this whole day until I saw an email from Ashok- the subject line read "Vtech killings". I have been following the news closely through the evening and I cannot get the grip yet- why would someone do such a horrible thing? What is the difference between such people and terrorists like Osama Bin Laden? I feel helpless as I can only sympathize with all the students in Vtech and probably join millions of others who are praying for all those who have lost their lives and all those in the hospital to make it back !!! You have to really lose your heart and soul to commit such a heinous crime- no reason will justify this killing. I just hope at some point there would be an end to all this senseless murders and probably more stricter gun laws!!! Yet another incident that will stay in our minds forever.

Life on the web?

"Oh I read it on the internet!" has become a norm of the day. Personally, I can take it only up to a certain point. I cannot quite get it when people tell "oh, I looked up that my red eye symptom on WebMD and was freaking out- may be it is that deadly infection that causes blindness" or "oh, I have stopped eating carrots because it is a root vegetable and is carbohydrate rich!" What ever happened to the good old doctors who pay a lot of money to earn their degree and to the balanced nutrition for a normal, active healthy person. I am not anti-internet and I do not claim "beware of the web-it will get you!". All I am saying is- take what ever you read on the web with a grain of salt. Not all of what you read may be right for you- you need to be able to assimilate all the information from the net and use it wisely. "Athikam kudithaal amruthammum nanju" (its an old tamil adage which essentially means- too much of anything cannot be good at all). I am not sure if it is worthwhile to change your lifestyle based on articles you read on the web. For example when it comes to food, there are these universally agreed bad food but surprisingly those can be cut down with effective choices that you make. But there are these others- always in the midst of controversies and you always wonder "should I eat/ drink it or not?". For those people I have one thing say- sooner or later there are going to be studies- "stop eating lest you shall die soon"- are you guys going to stop eating then?
About being our own docs- its a good thing to know your body in and out. If it does not behave, it might be because of a simple rhinovirus that you might have and not lung cancer!!
Make smart choices lest the web shall get you!!

What do we Indians care about?

Now I must warn you- I might be completely wrong for I simply have not spoken to a million people before this post, therefore these are primarily what I think about "What exactly do we Indians care about?!"
In a broad sense, we do not care much about anything as long as we are not disturbed from our cozy cocoons. Even then there will only be a stir and then we all go back down there. As the middle class communities we are a huge part of the gazillion people nation. We could have and should have made a difference but doesn't seem to be the case does it. Politics, health, education, civic amenities, environment, child labour (that's right I need a "u" there!), casteism, corruption...I could go on and on about the issues that we need to care about, yet something is amiss. All we do ever do is complain and big time (of course there are people trying to make a difference, only it is not enough). When I landed here in the US the first thing that struck me was the fact that people here care deeply about issues pertinent to them. They exactly know where things stand say for e.g. when it comes to there local school boards. They are very much AWARE of it.
In a land of billion people, I guess not many have the time, space and right resources to make any difference or to even care- but that does not mean we can become indifferent! That's right, that's what we have become-INDIFFERENT. Amazingly enough the people at home seem to be content going abot their routine (whether they are happy and enjoy their lives is a different issue, for it is a hard sight to catch a smiling face at least in Madras and at least during peak traffic times- everyone has a frown!!)

Back from India trip and it is snow day today!!!

So I am back!! This time with my mother...

(I had so much to write about when I was back home but sadly now I cannot remember much at all)
Anyway it is a snow day today for us here is MD- not because of 3feet of snow accumulation but due to freezing rain and sleet that fell till this morning- you could hear the thump! It was amazing. It is my mum's first ever snow (first ever in her life!), so she had to pull me out also for a walk...

Each maid a heroine, each man a friend!

We were crazy. We were young. Silly was the new normal! You could do just about any silly thing and get away with it. We had friends- they meant something. You could never imagine a life without these friends- who were they, where did they come from, what did they do, were they 10 pointers...none of it mattered. There was a promise that was made in our minds, a promise to be together for as long as time exists, a promise never to part. Life was as beautiful as it can get.

Skipping classes and paying a visit to the IC (Insti Cafetaria) or Sky (pappu da chai!) was normal. Rambling about ShivG to look for "love birds" -a topic for dinner table gossip was also perfectly normal. Those quite moments at the Saraswati mandir or the rush to reserve seats for friends at our Sunday breakfast were normal too.

Riding all the way to C'not the day before exams for a delicious glass of bluemoon butterscotch milkshake or butter masala dosa from Annapurna was being trendy in its own way..None of what we ever did seemed like a "waste of time".

I guess this quote sums it all up
How beautiful is youth! how bright it gleams with its illusions, aspirations, dreams! Book of Beginnings, Story without End, Each maid a heroine, and each man a friend!”
(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow)
Don't lose that child in you - that edgy, trendy, beautiful and strong youth in you!!

Vincent Van Gogh says- Its a pity that, as one gradually gains experiences, one loses one's youth.
Don't let that happen to you...

PS This is not the end of this post...its my favourite topic and you can surely expect more!

Pongalo pongal

Pongal nalvazhthukkal makkale!!
Thai porantha vazhi porakkumnnu kavizhar kannadasan sollittu poyitarungo...(The month between Jan15th and Feb 15th is called thai madham and its that special month of harvest) Its an important festival to remind us all to thank the Mother Nature for all the food we get from her and also the farmers who strive hard to put that plate of food on our tables. Traditionally its a 3-day festival- with first day called bogi pandigai (old things pave way to newer things, so we burn old things early in the morning and announce that proudly by beating the drums "molam"). The second day - big day called pongal thirunal- a day to pray and offer our thanks to all the entities of Mother Nature. And of course the famous- mattu pongal or kaanum pongal.

Do you still believe that global warming is a myth?

I am surprised that there are still people out there who say "global warming is a non-existent, inconsequential thing". The past 4 or 5 years that I have been here in the US, I have seen a steady increase in the temperatures during winter (the first year being the coldest). It was at 72C here in greenbelt on Saturday people!!!! This is January- where did all the 30s odd temperatures, with wind chills that could keep you at home forever, vanish? Oh what will happen to those wonderful bulbous plants that need at least a short period of freezing temperatures?! It is going to be really interesting to see whats in store for us as we get older.

HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS

Happy New Year people!
May this New year bring you all that you had ever wanted. Let us all make an effort to make this beautiful place a better place for us and every single living being on this planet..
So long 2006!!!

Friends

Sort of my contribution on this post by Kavitha.
I do too- everytime I refer to someone as my friend, I think about what exactly qualifies as this relationship that we share. I realize it is plain hard for me to make anything meaningful out of even a short 2-min telephonic conversations. I cannot even imagine how it might be if I were to meet my "friend" in person. It does not matter if it is this girl from school who was mistaken for a long time to be my twin or that guy from college I could not imagine being separated from- I simply dread meeting them in person after so many lost years! What to do you say to each other beyond the niceties of "hi, its been long or hi, how is life?!" Ah, those awkward moments!!
As Kavitha writes in her comments- I still don't understand why I am staying put. I might sound negative but its going to get worse- those ugly moments of stuttering and stammering, unsure of how you could have been inseparables in your distant past, when now, you cannot even look at each other with the same old excitement. I am not sure I recognize these people now, they have changed and so have I. It is not even the distance, even people who I see everyday- I don't know them anymore (so its something unfathomable I guess). I want it all to be the same again fully aware that it never will be (oh well, what is life without hope). But unlike many others who can persist... I feel sad when I think about those "friends" that I don't have anymore. Thats right I don't see any point in persistence. Well sometimes I do and sometimes I don't and may be that is why I am staying put. Whatever said and done,
Men may come and men may go but I go on forever (My favorite poem)!!
For all you who can persist- GO FOR IT, I am sure it will be worth it!

Indian movies- a feeling of disgust?!

I did not in my wildest dreams think that I would dedicate a post to Indian movies , oh well I guess watching this new movie Don was the trigger. I love both Hindi and Tamil movies (I like Hindi movies better!). When I am watching a movie (English, Indian or any other foreign movie) I hardly expect anything, so even if it is a mindless movies I can watch it (there are still quite a lot of those that seem to escape my tolerable limits!). Anyway this post is not about how awful, disgusting or even mindless Indian movies may be (I don't seem to think they are that bad). This post is more dedicated towards the role of bollywood and kollywood movies in our lives. Haven't we all as teenagers spent a considerable amount of time watching movies with our friends, talking about actors and even humming all those songs on the Super hit Muqabla show. I am sure those moments have become a part of our fond memories. So once we are "here", our tastes improve and we now like to watch classy movies which have good stories or actors or even fight scenes! But that's about it- there are no memories involved with these classy movies. In fact I can hardly associate movies I watch here with any of my friends but I can remember almost every movie I watched back home when I was in college ( I must say I was hardly a movie-watcher back then). There are events associated with each those of trips to the cinema hall and the events come to life when I hear a song from that particular movie or see a scene from that movie. If these movies have such an impact on our lives there is no reason to feel disgusted or have an attitude about watching an Indian movie. For all you know the next time you watch one- it might just be the best 3 hours, best day, best year or even the best moments of your life.

Art and therapy

Here is the much awaited verdict- any art form is therapeutic (yeah right as though the world was awaiting my judgement on it!!) No really, art forms- music, painting, cooking (note this has been added to the new version of top ten art forms that can sure you of your "depressed mind and soul") etc. can really save some of your worst days. You get depressed too often or you end up with a heavy heart after a marathon thinking session about the "world" in general, just try and do "something" that you have wanted to do for a long time and never got to it. The challenging task (now that is the toughest believe me!!) is to push yourself to do that "something". But once you do it, its very satisfying and you feel light. I am sure all of us have days where we just sit down on that damn couch staring at that TV spewing out random people and places. You might also be wondering as to why on earth you are watching this goddamn show that no one else watches EVER. On those days if you achieve the first step of willing/wanting to get out of it the next obvious step- try making a card or a piece of jewelry or even donuts!

World news people

I knew when they say "world news" (FOX, ABC...any channel) its not really world news. The media here (at least the local media here) seems to have a skewed vision of the world limited only to the United States and may be Iraq! But today my patience was pushed to its limits. The only world in the abc world news was "John somebody has been training some of the most expensive horses from around the WORLD" and that was it. I am not exaggerating folks. Can you imagine they have all these adverts claiming that their respective world news reports are the best. Seriously if the world news can stretch only up to kentucky derby horse races, I am sorry there is something seriously wrong!! Don't y'all agree?!!!

For all of you who want to eat a cake right now...

Yesterday I did give in and made the damn cake.....I have been wanting to try this cake
for a long time now. So I did, only it took me about 3 weeks to get to it and trust me it was worth the long wait!! The cake turned out awesome. For all you bakers out there...this might seem like a mockery of all baked goods and the good hearted corner bakery store guy, but for me its "yeh! I can make a cake". Just as one thing leading to another now I am waiting to lay my hands on bigger better stuff....and make a grand entry into the "World of wondrous fresh smelling baked goodies".


Don't be scared...go on make this cake!

Something to be happy about

I could not sleep after 5AM this morning- the reason "my parents 2nd visa interview". Yeah second interview, their visa was rejected the first time because the officers thought I could not support my parents with my meagre earning. Anyway back to my story- I tossed and turned waiting for their call. I was trying to call them but in vain. I thought that my parents were upset and so apdiye beechangarai pakkam poyittanga (you should read with a particular intonation that will make it sound funnier, anyway "so they decided to spend some time by the beach"- for Tamil illiterates). At about 8AM my mum finally called- she sounded so excited that no one can mistake it for anything else. She said "kedaichiruchu!!" and then ofcourse she went to describe the meeting.
From what ever she said- I sort of found this strange connection between the consulate officers and external examiners who come during final lab practical exams. I remember hearing all the time- everything depends on the external "avanga veetla sandai pottutu vantha namma gali" (if they are in a bad mood, we are done for!). Same goes for the consular.....and me like an idiot made double the effort to ensure a green signal for my parents

We were not this way before

Beware: a random, possibly depressing tale

Her friend from college, Em, who is her roommate now, came back from her vacation yesterday. They spoke exactly four sentences. It seemed a little odd to her that she kept count of it. Em and she had been great friends in college, they were in the same dorm and they went through all the best times together. But now, it seemed to her that they have moved so far apart that they don't even consider sharing important decisions of their lives with one another (Well she knew she was never good at that- she was not a great conversationalist). She was more of the silent character while Em had been the outspoken one!
What happened that had changed all of this, all the nice times they had- why didn't Em realize that there was a long time well wisher out there who wants to know about her life and the decisions she makes (not in the decision making process though..). She has been through such episodes of feeling betrayed, she thought that those episodes gave her the emotional strength that she has right now. This tryst with Em brought back memories that she has pushed to one corner of her mind! She had gone through such episodes of feeling betrayed. She had felt like a train station- only here the arrivals and departures seemed unannounced. As a teenager, she thought of it as a bad way- she felt like she had the powers of driving people away but as a wise, mature woman she has learnt the art of waxing and waning with the people that brush past her life. Although her heart yearns for a close-knit circle of friends with whom she can be carefree and herself, she has learnt to live her life the way it is. She jolted from her seat, realizing her flight was landing, with a smile on her- I don't need Em to make me feel better!!

Did you miss this show?

So today, I came home early (had to some errands run), I was at home by 4:15PM. I sat down to catch an episode of Oprah show gobbling up some vadas dipped in gorgeous chutney (my roommate had made it) and a cuppa masala chai to go with it (it felt absolutely exciting and great to have a evening snack with tea!!). Dont worry, the post is not about how good the vadas were or how aromatic the tea was.
On the Oprah show, today's theme was sort of "how to be yourself", as a lot of other Oprah shows this show also was mainly for women. Oprah's guests today were 3 celebrities- Dana Buchnan, Sheryl Crow and Ellen Burstyn. These women and a whole bunch of other celebrities talked about at what moment they became themselves or they realized that they were not being themselves and had therefore started a process of getting there.
I was not moved a lot by their stories but it definitely made me ponder- are there many women out there who feel that they are constantly giving and living up to others' expectations that they lose their identity in the process? I am not sure I can blame anyone for the way I turned out to be. I guess its not just women who might feel that way- specially now when we race against one another, race against time and ourselves to achieve the best possible life, well monetarily that is...and in the course of all these tight races we forget who we are, and why we are here in the first.
Any incident that can bring these races to a stand still- boom...we begin to realize that we have missed out on being ourselves for a long time until something happened to awaken us from our dreams. This is precisely what those celebrity women said but is it so hard to figure it out ourselves?!! Anyway after all this rants, do you still feel you missed this Oprah show?!

So whats cooking?

I never thought I would say it but folks, I think really love to cook. My favourite past time these days- graze through the world wide web for any mouth-watering, curious, "hmm, may be I could try that" or "oh, I need to make that one day' recipes. Its amazing how the blogging world is buzzling with foodies. I remember my grandma telling me many times that cooking is fun and that I should learn the art of cooking (samayal kalai). Well, I never did (I did help my mom quite a bit around the kitchen though). Also when I came here to the US, I was really nervous the first time I had to cook something (I thought I would suck at it!). As days went by I began to experiment,well not scientifically, not like putting together various ingredients in a bizzare my-own-kind of way but more like find new recipes and cook them in my own way!
I went out for lunch with a seminar speaker from Madison, Wisconsin- she was telling us (there were 2 other graduate students) that "if you cannot cook, you cannot do science". I won't take it that far but sure will say- if you are a scientist, you sure at some point or the other begin to like cooking.

Traditions- how important are they?

It is thanksgiving time and you get to hear all about traditions (Etymology: Latin, traditio meaning act of handing over) around this time of the year. I hear them say it while my mind wanders away- traditions, why are people so hung up on traditions? Are they really important? So there can be two different types of traditions: religious and social. Both types of traditions seem to be passed on by word of mouth (not much of written instructions). Although most people love to follow some of the oldest traditions- new ones are often created and sometimes long lost ones being re-established, an example being although pilgrims set apart thanksgiving day (after their first harvest) in 1620's, it was not until late 19th century when last Thursday of November was declared official day .

I realize that I do not have much of traditions to follow (religious or social)- I guess having been away from home could be one of the reasons. Not just that, our family lacks "traditions"- we are people who are sort of spontaneous. I don't remember my mother or grandmother saying "we have been doing this every year, we cannot not do it now- its our tradition", but I do know that my grandmother's had a lot of those. I am not sure if I feel left out in this whole tradition thing, but I sure do think they form a part of our life and probably remind us, every once in a while, of who we are. Having a constant, say an event (be it a place that you go to or eating a piece of cheesecake on a particular day either all by yourself or with someone you love) that occurs no matter how your life has turned out be or how much distinct you have become than you were a few years ago, definitely means something. It gives people the security and hope they need. Amidst busy lives that we all lead, traditions are reminders telling us to slow down, live and enjoy every moment of it. In the course of this blog I did want a tradition of my own, you know what may be if not now, at least a few years down the line I might have follow a tradition of my own- may be go to spa on the 15th of January every year (why this date and month...I don't know just made it up!!!)Hey its a tradition- don't ask questions, just follow it- its fun!!! Next time your mom asks to cook a complicated recipe grand mom's b'day or wear a sari on Diwali- don't fret...just do it, its a tradition that you need to cling on!!

The art of giving gifts

I remember back in the golden days- be it bdays or festive seasons, giving gifts was one thing I loved to do. Nothing expensive coz I was not earning (give me a break, I was just a student!). So one thing that always used to come in handy were the wonderful cards that hallmark carried (have you been to hallmark stores here, I think they are pathetic and boring). They were so many, I could spend hours together at a greeting card shop (infact that was the only kind of shopping I loved- trust me I did not grow up as a normal girl, may be now I am a bit!!). I would not gift the same thing to two different people, it cannot even be similar. Although I would start worrying about gifts a month before say my friend's bday, I would end up giving the gift a month later (in some cases it has been worse)..yikes! Sometimes I would make hand-crafted gifts (well whether they were good enough or not, I cannot tell). Whatever it was, they definitely imparted a bit of my persona as they were chosen with care, love and excitement.
Things have changed now, I still have all the thoughts but I somehow cannot get myself to decide about a gift. Infact I am so pathetic- this is what I say to myself "oh damn its my friend's bday, I need to get him something really nice" and then I hear myself "oh well how does it matter...no one cares if I give them gifts or not...why waste their time and mine too!!!" I know its pathetic but I wonder if its all got to do being an adult (now there are exceptions- I know people who still want to give gifts and get gifts) or is it because I am now surrounded by people who do not care for gifts, everything is so fast paced-there seems to be no time for selecting the right gift for the intended person. Forget gifts, sometimes it gets lousier- I send email to people wishing them (whatever the occasion may be)!!! I used to hate doing that......

May be you are not as bad as I am but I am sure there have been times when you have been through this too! So come on if you have not already begun...

Curiously strange

It looked like she had forgotten almost everything about her past, even yesterday was so far behind that she could hardly remember anything of it. Does it mean that her days have been so unenthusiastic and unexciting that she could not tell one day from another or was she suffering from some sort of strange illness that erases her memories off?

She knew it was not the first reason becuase she had a wonderful childhood and teen years (well teen years were mostly spent revolting against issues that no one else cared about!) until a few years ago when she lost her sister to an accident and she knew for the millionth time that she did suffer from any strange illnesses (she had just got her medical report back from her doc, although she did not believe that this strange illness could even be diagnosed). What was it that she was suffering from? Could she blame all this on the traumatic incident....but every wise person in her family had told her "time is healer", so then its not the accident......

what is it then? Do you folks ever go through this strange illness......some people would think of it as being addled or lost?

PS Some part of this "she" here is me but oh well...I have to get inspiration from somewhere!!! And yeah feel free to write what you think about it, in whatever form- prose, poetry, such random musings...whatever folks but do leave your thoughts here

Election time here!

So its mid-term congressional polls here. Its really amazing to see so many people aware of whats going on around them specially they seem to be very politically aware- who they want to see as their senators, county councillors, governors, house representatives and so on! As who is ruling is becoming more and more important in every country, I wonder how it will be if we, Indians were a bit more aware rather than being lackadaisical as we are now. We can hate our corrupt poiliticians how much ever we want but if need to bring about a change we all need to get our asses to the polling booths and vote wisely. I know unlike here in the US, there are at least a 1000 parties (recognized and registered but recognized, both national and state parties) How do we choose what is right for us, who will do the right things for us?!! Well I guess as a start, we should try and be more aware of who the people are that want to be in "power". And of course we should vote, but when we do, we should not just blindly vote (I am not sure I can give an example for that). As literate, sensible middle and upper-middle class folks are becoming more powerful and popular...a revolution is not far away.Awareness and action people!!

I belong to a third world country and I am proud of it

When someone says "oh I really like to visit India but I am really scared to go to a third-world country" I feel like throwing stuff at them or something. I think it is derogatory to call a country "thrid-world"- it means we are much below the industrialized giants such as USA, UK and some of their other western counterparts. But my inquisitveness begged for more answers and so I did some digging- when was this term first used? Why? and what does it mean now? It turns out that the term itself was coined by a French demographer Alfred Sauvy (it was "tiers monde"), what it meant was an ignorant, exploited third world wants to be something. Later it became synonymous with "underdeveloped" but for people like you and me, who do not understand much of economic divides- it became synonymous with more than just economy. People here in the first world nations found it unimaginable that someone could actually live in such countries (this was back in the 50s and 60s). ** At some point though the term probably became derogatory because of its connotation- it comes to mean "oh I am superior to you, you guys are just are just so far behind you will never catch up to me" (this no one knows and I could not find it on the world wide web people!!). That is what is annoying, its ok if you are ignorant and use it, but people from a "developing country" calling it a "third world" is simply hurting because they are fully aware of its derogatory aspect!!

Come on people, we are trying to be something- to do that we need to be cohesive, smart and help the folks out who want to do something. So next time you think about "tiers monde" imagine stuff being thrown at you!

** it is just my point of view!

Intelligent design: aren't we the smartest species!!

Sometime back I attended this talk by Dr.Maxine Singer
I went to the talk thinking it was going to be about biochemistry, cell biology....etc etc (Mind you I did read the title, but it never occured to me for even a second that it was a talk about intelligent design mainly for undergraduates!) So, entering a room full of undergraduates who seemed totally clueless was sort of amusing, I mean you could tell that they have been forced to attend (I am sure those who attended got a few extra points!). Lecture was not that great, at least I did not find it to be one. But her talk did make me think about "ID", Dover case so on and so forth. I was astounded that a mighty good number of people want to include ID in science classes. What is scientific about creationism? I mean these are literate people arguing for ID to be taught in a science class. Now how much sense can you put such people?
What more, if you visit this organization that supported the defendants in Dover case, it is even more mysterious. What interests this society might have in order to support "intelligent design"? I cannot answer any of these questions nor can I put my thoughts down coherently about this issue.

Oh btw, I did try to read the 139-page judgement report (dover case): I guess I must have been really naive to do so..it is a legal document, for heaven's sake!

Embarrassment- a random trivia or not!

There was interesting article in American Scientist

This piece talks about what is embarrasment and what role does it play in society. First of all, I did not even realize that there are people who actually work on something like embarrasment- I mean, come on it is sometimes so hard to share with your closest ones those very embarrasing moments, let alone think about it from a scientific stand point! Second of all, as I was reading it, it occured to me that I dont remember any embarrasing moments that I might have had (I am sure I have). Well, my friends might remember though...anything against me right people!!! Another thing that caught my attention was the fact that animals also seem to share this emotion, they get embarrassed too!! "Evolution of psychology is as conserved as biology is between species" (I read this somewhere, cant remember where..). This to me is a profound statement because a) it tells us there is something beyond our smart brains and the way we emote, that makes us distinct from other million (random number obviously) different species and b) it should humble us even more- animals are smart (we already knew this), if not smarter and they have emotions too- anger, jealousy and now embarrassment.
Anyway now I am off to try and remember at least a couple of embarrassing moments and I leave you guys smirk at your own or even share it with someone and have a good laugh
Bonne nuit!!

Deepavali: a piece of my writing- Beware its sort of sad!

Its damn Diwali time again, she mused to herself. She could have said it aloud and the walls would have roared back in amusement as they stood still watching her go through this plight. She was going through a plethora of ambivalent emotions- should she be happy that its festive time again or should she moan and fret about the mishappenings of the past which, she cannot do anything about. There was no one who could help her (even if there was someone and they indeed wanted to help, at least that is what she told me!), after all she was living alone in a strange city. Her parents were in Agra and so were her most of her friends. She remembered that it was her choice to take up the job in this strange city and that it was not even to her liking. She wanted to continue with it just because it gave her the time she needed to think, rethink and recount many times how her life drastically changed in the summer of 2000. It gave her what she needed most- some space. As she drew closer to her friend's place for a Diwali dinner party, she resented herself for having agreed to the invitation. She needed some more time to get back to normal, she concluded and decided to turn back. She would have unless her eyes caught the joy of two small children trying to light a wet fire cracker. They were so amused that nothing could stop them enjoying the moment they were in. Suddenly they seemed invincible, larger than life figures to her- she wanted to break free and let go off the past. Neither did she turn back nor did she go over to her friend's place, but she did shove all her thoughts for another time...

We never know when or why changes happen- but they happen, for better or for worse. We, as a mere life form on this earth have to just keep on going as best as we could!

PS I know this piece of writing is strange- no beginning or an end but that is how I write!!

Fusion music- are you ready?

This past Saturday, my roommates and I went for Pt.Hariprasad Chaurasia's Celestial Symphony at Lisner Auditorium in DC. But for the fact that we paid $25+5.75 (Convenience charges if you buy tickets from ticketmaster), the concert was good. It was really interesting to overhear conservations about how the concert was. There were quite a few people who thought that tabla did not go well with the fusion. Surprising they would say that because the "tabla maestro" Zakhir Hussain was one of the first few musicians to do symphonies. I personally thought the symphony was very good- the compositions were well made, set to a fast beautiful rhythm. The only problem was the sound for the tabla was a little too much in the first half. A very different and interesting addition was a Kathak performance- it was good!

So I was googling about such symhponies and it was rather surprising to know that Pandit Ravi Shankar was almost the first musician to create such symphonies with jazz musicians (the first person I think was Panditji's guru), this was back in the 50's.

Whatever said, I realized any sort of music pleased my senses and I felt awkward coz I seemed the only person who kept tapping her feet, nodding her head and following the taal very energetically.

Science is...no was ...or is...fun?!!

Sorry about this strange title, that is exactly how I feel especially now that I am far into my PhD. There was reason for me being where I am right now (doing a PhD)- I just love to understand what happens inside of us or any organism for that matter, anything to do with biology triggers an unknown emotion. Interestingly learning so, has and will continue to humble most people. Science was not professionalized until late 19th century (around the time when Darwin proposed his theories of evolution). Not suprisingly, when the one of the first research journals was established, it was ridiculed- researchers thought it was an absurd concept of having to publish their work! Now 2 centuries later, most of what a scientist wants are publications and grants ofcourse, probably there are not be fully blamed eh?! In this mad game of publishing and getting more grants, looks like PIs have lost sight of what brought them to this field. The concept of philosophizing is almost non-exisistent. What is even more disconcerting is the fact that they are passing it on their students..."Just do the experiments, get your data...we will talk about everything else later" seems to be the norm. I really hope this changes, for people like me are here to have fun and lots of it.

Acadia National Park- a visual treat!

The weekend trip to Acadia national park was worthwhile. We (6 of us) reached the park on Saturday morning and right away headed for the "Precipice trail"- well the name should have told us something. We had let the most experienced people in our group make the decision of choosing where to hike and they CHOSE precipice. Although it was amazing, I still have to complain...come on they are my roommates!! So, they knew the trail was "the most strenous" and as we started out we realized it was a vertical hike on the face of this ~1000ft mountain. And for a person like me who is just not a heights person...the first time I had to put my feet on the ladder to get on with the trail was a nightmare, after that c'rse I was the pack lead (I am quite proud of that). We also took a longer trail back to get down to the park loop. But folks, there were some amazing views of the ocean, lakes and general wilderness. It began to get cold by about 4PM. The trip to Bar Harbor town to have a decent, not-so expensive meal was just wasteful (the entres were about $20 and guess what...hurray to pizza!). Oh food reminds me of this country restaurant where we stopped for lunch (it was in East Corinth in Maine)-boy they gave us so much food, all of us lost our apetite, it was a really a lot of food for cheap price! This photograph is just so that you guys can have a depth perception- it is ledge and if I let go off the railing..... ram nam satya hai ho jata mera yaaron (for those unfortuates who dont understand Hindi- it translates to "I might die"). If you dont believe me- look at the caution sign below, the last couple of lines say "People have been seriously injured or even die".



If you get a chace folks, you should definitely visit the park, every season has something new to offer!